


Spice, Spice, Baby

by Lasgalendil



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Adorable Finn (Star Wars), Bisexual Poe Dameron, Fluff, Fuck JJ Abrams, M/M, Past Poe Dameron/Zorii Bliss, Poe Dameron Deserved Better, Queers in Space, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Fix-It, Teasing, bisexuality is a THING disney, fuck Disney, fuck lucasfilm, fuck racism, make it gay you cowards, or at least bi or pansexual, zorii bliss is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:02:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22121155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lasgalendil/pseuds/Lasgalendil
Summary: Dameron's new bf is adorable, and so, /so/ gullible....what's a girl to do to her former (not) spice-runner with benefits? Tease the shit out of him, that's what.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Zorii Bliss & Finn, Zorii Bliss & Poe Dameron
Comments: 7
Kudos: 124





	Spice, Spice, Baby

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't seen TRoS and I have NO intention to.

“Hold on!” Poe shouted, throwing the Millennium Falcon into hyperdrive.

Finn held on to the seat grips for dear life. “What are you doing!”

“Light speed skipping!”

“_Light speed skipping_—?!” Finn objected. “How do you even know how to do that?”

“A former life.” Poe grunted, pulling them in and out of hyperdrive.

“He was a spice-runner,” Zorii yawned, bored of the whole affair.

“You were a _spice-runner_—?!” Finn yelped.

“Oy, you were a storm-trooper,” Poe argued. “And I wasn’t a spice-runner. I was a pilot.”

“For spice-runners.” She teased. “And he was a storm-trooper? My, my, Dameron, you do have a type.”

“He wasn’t _actually_ a Stormtrooper, he broke me out,” Poe amended.

“No, mate,” Finn sighed. He turned to Zorii. “I was totally a Stormtrooper.”

“You never even fired your gun,” Poe insisted. “You can’t have been a Stormtrooper if you never even shot at civilians. And I was a pilot.” He continued. “For an undercover operation for the New Republic using spice-runners who’d agreed to let us smuggle refugees with their cargo, thank you.” He sniffed. “I wasn't a spice-runner, it was a _legitimate government operation_.”

“Right. You weren’t a spice-runner just like _he_ wasn’t a Stormtrooper,” Zorii heckled.

“But, but you were the _pilot_.” Finn insisted.

“Of course I was the pilot, what else was I gonna do?” Poe said in exasperation. “Babysit???”

“For spice-runners!” Finn repeated.

“Not too bright, this one,” the grin was obvious even under her helmet. “I see why you like him.”

“Wait, you two were a _thing_—?” Finn asked.

“For a while.” Zorii shrugged.

“We were never a _thing_,” Poe insisted. “We fucked. That was it.”

“Oh my god you were a spice-runner and you two were totally a thing!” Finn groaned. “How did I not know this about you?”

“We were not a thing!” Poe argued. “There was nothing emotional about it! I was young and hot-headed and having near-death experiences daily and Zorii here had a cool helmet and lacked a moral compass. Of _course_ we fucked.”

Zorii grinned. “So, Dameron…do you want to meet your baby?”

“_You two had a_ _BABY_—?!” Finn cried.

“Zorii Bliss I will drop this ship out of kriffing hyperspace!” Poe threatened. “See if I don’t!”

Zorii only cackled.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, how about we NOT retcon 2 movies and 4 years worth of comics to make the only Latino in the sequels a former drug dealer...


End file.
